I'm sick.

With only 41 days until Christmas, I'm starting to panic. How unlike to me to not be entirely prepared? My cards are ready, stamped and sealed... But the gifts! I'm so behind. I hate shopping. This can't be promising. I'm considering do online shopping. Nothing says personal like online ordered gifts, non? If work isn't nutso this weekend my tree will go up.

I'm sick, btw. The only real reason I am bothering to write something. Just to let everyone know I don't feel well. Some nasty coughing evilness has been with me for a good week now. Perhaps if I got some rest and stopped yacking for a bit it would get better. Instead, I've gone with the "ignore it and it will go away" approach. It's not working, but it proved to be an entertaining two days of teaching a course with a voice that sounded like a 14 year old boy during that part of his life.

Ever have something you want to know, something that intrigues you... Or maybe something you already know but you want confirmation on? I have a few situations like that going through my head these last few days. Some I'm more interested in than others, but all those " I want to know, I want to go further" ... I'm probably not justified for wanting to know certain things... But few things actually perk my curiosity and lately... it's been perked.

I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter.

So I spent Friday night at the "Other guys" ... Well, the former "other guys"... Guess they lose that title when you change towns *shrug* What cooler way to spend your Friday evening than to spend it in the garage of a funeral home - one that I don't even work for. I've been meeting some pretty dapper people lately. I think I'll keep them around.

As for the new job - it's going well. The people are fantastic, the politics are entertaining and there is a Timmies practically sharing our parking lot. Can you ask for anything more? Wait... Yes you can. Individualism. That is the one thing I will miss. I have a very strong sense that you can get easily lost in the crowd... That there is not much room to acheive, make a difference to the whole, and become yourself. I guess that is not a bad thing, I mean if that is the most discomfort I have then I am laughing. It's just something I have to work at. Something I have to change. Change is good, right? It's funny though - I have a sense that if you make an error - you will certainly become an individual very quickly.

The pace is apparently slower than it has been so we have not been run off our feet by any means. Steady though. Steady is good. I am too often tempted to eat restaurant style surrounded by so many potential places to eat. Some days are healthier than others. For example, the other day started with me choosing to be low calorie girl - so I skipped breakfast, went with a coffee and figured I would eat weeds for lunch and dinner. Instead, I found a caramel chocolate Halloween bug in my mail slot so I ate that for breakfast. Followed by appointments through lunch - and me getting light headed so I had a ball of frozen cookie dough. I came home with full intentions of skipping dinner, instead, somehow managed to eat over half a bag of Doritos, cheese, pepperoni, jalepenos, more cheese, and then a giant steak sandwich at 8p.m. while I lay in bed watching Hannible rising... (Jack was having a poker night so I was in hiding - only leaving to steal food) ... After that " meal" I was so sick I was in tears and rolled over with the full intentions of dying.

I woke up anyway. Needless to say, I didn't wake up with a thin day.

Right now, well, before I started on the blog, I was getting ready for my friend's upcoming Shower and Bachelorette party planning. She made me promise that I would not go to bed, and that I would go out with the girls. When did I become such a stick in the mud. I like to sleep by 8:30 ideally, go out VERY rarely - the mood and company have to strike me at the exact moment. I laugh thinking back to the last time I was at her place in Barrie this year ... Everyone went out on a " night on the town" and I wished everyone a good night and found my guest bed ;) What a gem, I am. I think the only people who can manage to keep me awake for the entire night are the folks from back home at work. *laugh* And as if that was not bad enough - to point out how I really am a 60 year old trapped in my body, I DID hear my favourite song in an elevator the other week. Dear God, can I be saved?

Oh...

I went to visit a friend the other day. Friend, funny how that works out. I don't feel that too many people are my "friend", and this person has oddly enough weaseled his way into this spot. Over coffee we laughed, talked, and laughed some more. He's one of those people who laughs and does it well. It's very genuine. He's managed the fine and difficult to find balance of playful guy meets perfect gentleman - a rare breed. He told me about a video that I should take a look at - something that really seemed to have moved him. When I went home I found it online and there went 1 hour and 44 minutes of my life as I was glued to the screen - watching a 47 year old professor give his "final lecture" ... as he was dying. Actually, I lost more than that amount of time. I was not counting the 20 minutes of crying I did afterwards. Randy Pausch. Watch it.

I'm too tired to even read over - I apologize for any typos, splices, etc. Blah. Me sleepy. I'm surprised I even gave this five minute of my time. I'm glad I type quickly. Sleep sweet!